pikestaff: (Twilight Sparkle - Sadface)
Huxley is leaving tomorrow and I am not happy about this situation :( I think I'll adjust okay after a day or so, but I am... reeeeallly not looking forward to going to the airport tomorrow xD

We're still planning on the fall visit in a couple of months, but I'll really have to kickstart my money situation for that, so I have to figure out some way to accomplish it.
pikestaff: (Applejack - Thinky)
Today is my last day of full-time hours at work. Starting tomorrow I'm bumped down to about 25-30. It will do good things for my mental health, but not-so-good things for my paycheck.

Oh well. Having a couple of months of full-time really gave me a boost. I was able to pay off one of my medical bills (which will save me about $500/year), I was able to put some extra money into my car payments, and I was able to apply for a passport and set up an eye doctor appointment.

I'm seriously considering getting a second job for a few months, at least. Two part-time jobs = one full-time job, right? We'll see, though. I'm going to give myself a few weeks to rest and think about it.

:|

Feb. 11th, 2012 10:32 am
pikestaff: (River)
More and more I'm really unimpressed with my job, especially since that whole fiasco yesterday. I'm really tempted to apply for a passport, and then as soon as that's finalized just quit, hop on a plane, and spend a few weeks with Hux and not worry about a new job until I come back. Unfortunately that's not terribly feasible since I'll need money saved up to pay my monthly bills in the interim. I've got about $300 in a savings account for that express purpose right now but I'll probably want at least twice that as a bare minimum.

I only got $300 back for my tax refund and every penny of it is getting saved for passport + eye doctor & new glasses (my eyesight has gotten noticeably worse over the past year.)

So meh, I guess I've just gotta stick around and save up more dosh.

Maybe I should get serious with publishing again? I think I'll finally take a good look at getting a hard copy of "Windshifter" out, and maybe email that one publisher again (that showed interest last year) and see if they'll change their mind.
pikestaff: (Pony Marine)
Lately I keep having weird recurring dreams where I'm left feeling helpless and terrified. Things like losing my job, or being tugged around and forced to move again. You know, stuff that has happened to me before and that apparently has imprinted myself into my subconscious as some sort of post-traumatic-stress thing.

Wish I was self-sufficient and could control my own life! Oh well. There's a part of me that thinks I'm actually happier being a semi-leech who only works 25 hours a week and doesn't have to pay rent, because it allows me to work on things like writing and is probably better for my social-anxiety-riddled mental health in general. I can't decide if it's bad/irresponsible to think that or not.

Anyways the same old is up with me. Work is still the same. I'm still jobhunting for something better, to no avail. I'm barely keeping afloat with money but saving up is extremely difficult. It seems like I always need more money for something. I need to see the eye doctor because my eyesight is getting worse and I need new glasses, I need new tires on my car, I need a new computer because this one is starting to fall apart, I need to get a passport and visit Huxley, I need I need I need. First world problems, I guess. Pretty high-on-the-totem-pole first world problems (cause things like eyesight and transportation are pretty important), but still first world problems nonetheless.

Tuesday

Oct. 1st, 2011 09:42 am
pikestaff: (Steampunk Vinyl Scratch)
So they finally got the background check in at Kmart and I start working on Tuesday. I'm about as excited for this as one can get for a boring retail job. At least I'll have a paycheck again, I guess?

Living with my dad is a lot different from living with my mom, and not really in the way that I would've expected. I think my dad has prodded me to "eat healthier" more since I've been here than anyone else has in the rest of my life combined. He is also fond of pointing out that I owe him $2000 (he loaned that to me so I could get started on car payments, several years ago) and he also loves to remind me that I have a bunch of junk in the garage to sort through. And you know, it's all well-meaning, especially the stuff about eating healthier, but I think it just comes off as overbearing because he gets lonely REALLY EASILY and he likes to pop into my room and talk to me. He really has no one else-- my brother is just as reclusive as I am-- and whereas my mom had all my sisters and her boyfriend, my dad has no one.

I try not to get annoyed by it. He's giving me free rent after all (at least until I get situated); he's buying me food, and he's doing what normal people do-- which is seek human interaction. I don't think he quite groks that I don't operate that way, but I don't want to mention it, because, again, he's the normal one here, not me. That's how I feel, at least. So I let him talk to me, and we went to a movie together (Lion King 3D) last Sunday, and I think that really made his night.

AAAANYWAYS I'm trying to teach myself to be patient because barring a miracle it's going to be at least two or three years before my financial situation starts looking halfway decent again, and the whole immigration thing (Huxley is in England and we want to get him over here, for those of you who missed the memo the first time around) looks fairly intimidating. It will all be worth it, of that I've no doubt, but patience is the key and I'm having a tough time reminding myself of that. xD It's tough when everyone else your age is getting married and having kids and buying houses and stuff, and you're not. Not gonna lie!
pikestaff: (Default)
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, obviously.

~

I'm not gonna lie; the past couple of days have been rough. I got the paycheck I'd been waiting on from OfficeMax, but it was about a third of the size that I thought it would be. Which means I'm getting another paycheck in a couple of weeks, I'm sure, but that doesn't do much to help me NOW. Similarly, I can't start working for Kmart until the background check goes through, and it's been a week and it hasn't gone through yet.

So I am broke.

I've had a few people, both family and friends, who have been loaning me money. And I'm very appreciative of them, but on the other hand it sort of makes me feel like a burden. Someone who does nothing but beg people for money. Logically I know that's not true; as Huxley mentioned to me the other day, the only time I even dream of broaching the subject is when I'm truly desperate. Still, I feel bad. I wish I didn't have to rely on everyone else for everything. I wish I wasn't almost 30, stuck at home, getting help with money and wondering how on earth I'm ever going to get Huxley over here and join that elusive "adulthood club" and do all those "adult things" I'm supposed to do, like start a family and whatnot, if I can't afford it.

More and more I feel left behind by the rest of society, and it's not easy to deal with.
pikestaff: (My Little Pike Pony)
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Pretty much everything!

---

I went to the bank today and talked to a banker in a last-ditch bid for cash and loan consolidations. I discovered two interesting things of import: a.) I can cut my car insurance down by $100 a month (so we got that ball rolling), and b.) my credit is getting confused with my dad's, which is negatively affecting my score. A lot. So I'm working on getting that sorted out as well.

I need as much cash savings as I can get because my paycheck today was ridiculously small. I was hoping for $400 (which is already much less than what I need) and got like... $340. Dem cut hours man. And I'm missing payments this month already and am getting slammed with late fees. SO YEAH.

I can't wait for insurance savings + gas savings. I just hope I get decent hours at the new job. I'll give 'em a few months to see if I can snag a full time spot. Otherwise it's back to jobhunting.

Anyways the rest of the day was spent: being tired, attempting to play Civ IV and quitting because I was tired, derping around on the internet being tired, trying to talk myself into working on "Windshifter" and failing because I was tired, and finally doing a bunch of online quizzes with Huxley for a couple of hours. Which was the most fun part of the night.

I'm still tired...

Update

Aug. 24th, 2011 01:56 pm
pikestaff: (Twilight Sparkle - Sadface)
At this point it looks like I'm staying here, the biggest reason by far being that I have no idea how to get my stuff over to Montana. After double checking all around, it turns out that no one in my family can afford a big truck or the gas that said big truck would require, and I don't want to give my stuff away because that would be complicated and would also mean I'd basically have, well... nothing left. Which sounds pretty materialistic, but hey, I'm kind of fond of having, I dunno, a dresser and a mattress and stuff. Anyways, I'm not quite that desperate yet. (Although I might be, soon.)

Unfortunately this locks me into being stuck here for another year. I had a lot of people in my last post suggest I wait to move until I secure a job over there; the downside with waiting to move is that I have a limited window of four months or so where the precarious mountain passes between here and Montana aren't covered with snow and ice. That window is about to close, and then I'll be stuck here, whether I want to be or not, until next summer. And knowing that I'm SO CLOSE to being able to move before I have to bunker down and deal with another long winter here, and then choosing to turn down that opportunity, is tough to do.

So, yeah, it's... looking like I'm stuck here, unless a bunch of money turns up from out of nowhere in the next week or so. I've had people suggest I just e-publish Windshifter already, which I honestly really want to do ASAP if only so I can finally get the danged project off of my back, but remember that Amazon only pays out four times a year or so. Not to mention, I'm not gonna pin any financial hopes on an e-book from a new and untested author. I mean, it's nice to dream, but I've gotta be realistic here...

Anyways, that's sort of where I'm at right now. I do appreciate all the advice and stuff that everyone has been giving me, and I apologize for my panicking and flailing and whatnot... I guess I will just have to make the best of it.
pikestaff: (Rainbow Dash - Do Not Want)
I'm writing this all out here mostly as a way to try and sort my thoughts (and also beg for advice.)

Read more... )

NEW JOB

Aug. 19th, 2011 11:31 pm
pikestaff: (Pinkie Pie - Bounce)
I'm copypasta-ing this from G+ so feel free to skip it if you follow me over there.

NEW )
pikestaff: (Giddy Snaps)
General update for anyone not following me on Facebook/G+ :

I've been doing Camp NaNoWriMo (that new summer NaNo I was touting all spring) since August 1; today I hit exactly 13,000 words. Which is still a solid three days behind, but I'm feeling optimistic about catching up, especially now that I've discovered a secret method for motivating myself, which is to allow myself ten turns of Civ inbetween every paragraph of writing. This is a very surprisingly solid motivator and if it continues to be so then I don't think I'll have any problems catching up. Also, the scene I'm currently working on is fun as all heck.

Jobstuff - hours have been cut pretty much department-wide; it's kind of scary. I've essentially given up looking for a job here and am now looking around Bozeman, sending out emails and the like and hoping I get a bite from someone who will understand that I can't exactly waltz in for an interview. I'm hoping I can get something to that end sorted out within a few weeks, and then I can move a few weeks after that and be back all warm and snug in Montana before winter hits.

My life is really scary these days with money and stuff but I've kind of quit caring about that. I'm far too busy with other things to concern myself too much with "OH NO I PAID ONE OF MY BILLS LATE IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD". I mean, they're just gonna have to deal. It's not like I'm the only one having money issues right now.
pikestaff: (Default)
I went to PetSmart yesterday to pick up some guinea pig food and a couple of otos for my tank. As is usual when I go to a pet store these days, I felt a weird sense of dissonance about being a customer and not an employee. I worked with these animals as a job, 40 hours a week, for three years. I can tell you the eating, breeding, and behavioral habits of over one hundred species of fish; I can tell you what makes a syrian hamster tick as opposed to a dwarf hamster, or a Chinese dwarf hamster, or a Roborovski hamster; I can tell you where a conure's favorite place to be scratched is; I can tell you why beardies are picky eaters and when they'll stop being picky eaters and I can tell you what a greek tortoise's favorite color is. And I should be teaching people all of these things and be on that side of the fence! Not over here on the customer side.

So as usual, it weirded me out.

I thought about asking them if they were hiring but a.) I've asked them like two or three times before and they've always turned me down, and b.) that would only lengthen my commute, so it's really not a good idea.

Anyways yeah.

Sears is cutting my hours like mad so I am in dire need of a new job; too bad there's nothing out here. Hrmm...

Hi guys!

Jun. 13th, 2011 11:18 pm
pikestaff: (Photo Finish)
So I just spent three hours getting a really, really ancient Linux port of Alpha Centauri working! Because, you know, that's what I do when I'm too lazy to spend two minutes hopping over to my Windows partition.

I think I may have just epitomized geekhood.

ALSO, after work today I checked my voicemail and I had a message from the human resources person at Kmart. She wants me to call her back tomorrow! Presumably it's to set up an interview. Which has me far more nervous about it than I probably should be. I guess I just have to keep calm, stick to my requirements of hours/wages (not gonna take it if it's sub-25 hours a week, I think), and continually remind myself that I have never NOT been hired after making it to the interview stage at a retail job.

This is exciting! As much as I'd LOVE to get out of retail, because the dealing-with-people thing is tough on me, I want to get out of this money hole first. If this job offers me ~30 hours a week and at least $9/hr (small potatoes, but this won't be commission, after all), that + gas/car wear & tear savings should be a moderate help.
pikestaff: (Twilight Sparkle - Sadface)
According to my mom's friend, who fixes cars, I need new tires.

Tires are expensive. I can't afford new tires.

...of course, I also can't afford to NOT have new tires.

I'm feeling at a complete loss; I've applied to so many new jobs lately and I'm not getting anywhere. Guess I just gotta keep on trucking. If all else fails I have an emergency "out": namely, about a week or so back at work, I applied for a Sears credit card as part of a joke with a coworker (looong story). I figured I wouldn't get approved, because come on, my credit has sucked for the last couple of years. So that was part of the joke. SURPRISE! Approved. So now I have another credit card, which I promptly decided I was NOT EVER GOING TO USE because I REALLY don't want to get more in debt and I REALLY don't want another monthly payment but if my tires go out I may have no choice. (At least I'd get an employee discount for using it at the Sears automotive place, right?)

Sorry for the whine! I'm honestly trying not to whine in LJ so much lately but it seems like this crap just keeps happening.

IT KEEPS HAPPENING

I WARNED YOU ABOUT MONEY BRO, I TOLD YOU DOG

But yeah anyways I guess I just gotta:



Speaking of which I'm going to play Alpha Centauri for the rest of forever
pikestaff: (Rainbow Dash - Not Impressed)
So the bank that I applied at never called me back, and I'm too chicken to call them (I'm not sure who I would call, anyway, since I applied for a "put me at any of your branches" position), so I guess that's out. I sort of think the next step is to apply at Wal-Mart, though I'm sure the chances of that working out aren't very high because they must get about a billion job apps a week, on top of the fact that they aren't actively hiring right now anyway.

~

I reeeeally wish I could move back to Montana; from what my dad is telling me the job market is a lot better over there so long as you're willing to settle for retail, which I am at this point. Truthfully, the ONLY thing keeping me from moving back right now is that I've got some large pieces of furniture that I would have no way to get over there, and my mom does not want me to leave them here, and I have no idea what else to do with them. They're too large for me to take to a secondhand shop, and the idea of using Craigslist or something terrifies me. So I'm pretty stuck.

I wish that either I or my dad had enough money to get a moving truck over here, but I don't think that's going to happen. Le sigh. Either way, I think it's time to start going through my room and dumping a lot of my smaller stuff. I've moved so many times over the course of my life, and the last five years especially, that I feel like my whole "physical" life is just a mess, filled with things I don't need, duplicates of things I had at one point and can't find, etc. So a mass cleanup is in order. Maybe then I can figure out how to deal with the furniture.

Edit: K-Mart is hiring! Sears and K-Mart are basically the same thing after they merged so maybe I have a shot at this. Definitely applying. I'd save so much on gas.
pikestaff: (Applejack - Thinky)
At my current job, on a good sales day, I'm making about $11-$12 an hour. That's really not bad at all, and makes the long drive (barely) worth it. Still, between gas prices and only averaging about 22 hours a week... I'm barely pulling even, and all it will take is another week or two of particularly low hours (since I never know what I'll get, week to week) and I'll have to start doing things like canceling my phone and "forgetting" to make credit card payments. Which I'll do if I have to, but I'd really rather not.

So I've been looking for a job again that's actually in town. It'll probably end up being minimum wage, and as such I'll have to significantly up my hours to match the $12-ish I'm making now. Well, maybe not significantly, since I'll be saving so much gas money. But! Still. And to make a long story short, finding a job around here that's not part-time is next to impossible, which is why job hunting isn't going particularly well.

So then I thought... maybe I should be looking for jobs around Bozeman, too. Sure, it's 600 miles away or whatever, but if I said "I can work starting August 1" or something, that'd give me some time to get over there. If I'm jobhunting in two completely different towns-- since my mom is here, and my dad is over there-- that doubles my chances, right? Or is it not gonna work because they'll want interviews and stuff?

Anyways, it was just an idea. I'm mostly just rambling now because I'm somewhat bored and it's too early to go to bed... eh, I think I'll go to bed anyway. Ni-night!

YES

May. 6th, 2011 10:04 am
pikestaff: (Pinkie Pie - Bounce)
Dear [Pike],

A forbearance has been applied to your FFEL account(s) through 28-Apr-2012. Your next payment will be due 28-May-2012.


Okay, so! I have one year to figure out my money situation. Let's hope this isn't turn into a repeat of last year, where within months of having "one year to figure out my money situation" my entire world turned upside down and I had to restart from scratch.

So long as I can get a better job before the end of the year (which means to start looking NOW) I think I'll be set.

In semi-related news, I got my paycheck today, so I can let out a big sigh of relief after running around with an empty bank account for the last week. It's not a particularly "big" paycheck, but it was just about spot on in terms of what I need, plus there's a bit left over to apply to my credit card so I'm not just making the minimum monthly payment.

Welp, I'm off to work~

Wat

Apr. 29th, 2011 12:26 am
pikestaff: (Pinkie Pie - GREAT SCOTT!)
Suddenly, from out of nowhere...

HOURS, AT WORK, NEXT WEEK

I'm thinking these next two paychecks are going to be rather sizable... at least compared to my recent ones.

I may be thoroughly broke and the first 27 years of my life may have been a big ball of fail but I refuse to give up hope on the future!
pikestaff: (Rainbow Dash - Not Impressed)
I MANNED UP and called the student loan people this morning. Basically I said "Uh hi, I keep trying to send in forbearance requests and nobody is getting back to me, and I have to pay you guys $300 today and that means I'm going to be walking around with NO MONEY in my account for the next week and I have to pay for gas and stuff. Wat do?"

Their response? "Oh you have to make at least one full payment before we can begin to process your forbearance request, so go ahead and make a payment and then call us back in a couple of days and we'll see what we can do."

...yeah, NOW you guys tell me.

SO YAY I'M GOING TO BE BROKE NOW!

I would launch headlong into art commissions or something at this point but I'm working the next five days or so... plus, I'm already so behind on them that it's hard to motivate myself. Which is awful; I REALLY need to get on those again because I owe so many different people different things.

I'm kind of a wreck; I spent most of last night crying while desperately trying to hide it cause I was embarrassed. This morning I'm less depressed and much more cranky. xD
pikestaff: (Rainbow Dash - Do Not Want)
I got a cryptic letter from my student loans. This is what it says:

Dear Borrower:

We have received your request for forbearance; unfortunately, we are unable to process your request for the following reason(s):

There are not enough forbearance months available to bring your account(s) current.

Other: Please make a full monthly payment in order for our forbearance to be process. [sic]

Please make all necessary corrections and return all information with this letter.

Sincerely,

Processing Specialist

I really have no IDEA what they mean by that first reason there. The second I have an inkling of-- namely, I need to cough up $300 within about six days (Yeah, I've NO clue how I'm going to do that. I'll be lucky if I have that much in my bank account right now, and I still have $400 worth of cash going to my car payment + insurance this weekend). But the "there are not enough forbearance months available" thing? Yeah, I have NO idea what they're talking about or what they want me to fix.

I went to their website and managed to electronically submit another request for forbearance, and I'm hoping that will do the trick, because if you recall, last time I sent the form to Wells Fargo and then they sent it on to this new bank. So maybe, now that I can bypass the middleman, my chances are better.

I hope it works and that they get it and decide to process it before I need to figure out where this $300 is coming from. Otherwise I'll have to call them, and I hate calling people. I'll do it, though, I just won't be happy about it.

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