pikestaff: (Rainbow Dash - Not Impressed)
A coworker brought up a good point to me yesterday: namely, I'm sitting here making all these plans as if my new 40-hours-a-week status is set in stone when in actuality they're going to slash my hours in half again as soon as they find a new service desk person. Who knows how long that will take, but still, it is a concern.

This would be a cue to start seriously jobhunting again but I'm not sure how well a new job would take it if I said "btw I'm going overseas for a month this summer."

Maybe I should just quit everything before going to visit Hux, and then jobhunt in earnest when I come back? It'd be easy enough to find a part-time retail job the minute I get back while searching for something more permanent.

What do you guys think?


Jan. 6th, 2012 11:14 am
pikestaff: (Derpy - Dragonborn)
My Nintendo DS games are all in a little white case about the size of my outstretched hand, and they've been missing since about a year and a half ago, when I moved from my apartment to, well... here (this was before the move to Washington.)

Well, I just spent a few hours digging through every single one of the boxes I brought with me from WA and the games aren't anywhere to be found.

Which means I probably left them in Bozeman to begin with, which means they're either in one of a dozen or so boxes high up in the garage that I can't reach, or they're in some storage locker somewhere.

Which means I can't continue my search and rescue rampage until my dad comes back from work.

I am a sad pony. :(
pikestaff: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, obviously.


I'm not gonna lie; the past couple of days have been rough. I got the paycheck I'd been waiting on from OfficeMax, but it was about a third of the size that I thought it would be. Which means I'm getting another paycheck in a couple of weeks, I'm sure, but that doesn't do much to help me NOW. Similarly, I can't start working for Kmart until the background check goes through, and it's been a week and it hasn't gone through yet.

So I am broke.

I've had a few people, both family and friends, who have been loaning me money. And I'm very appreciative of them, but on the other hand it sort of makes me feel like a burden. Someone who does nothing but beg people for money. Logically I know that's not true; as Huxley mentioned to me the other day, the only time I even dream of broaching the subject is when I'm truly desperate. Still, I feel bad. I wish I didn't have to rely on everyone else for everything. I wish I wasn't almost 30, stuck at home, getting help with money and wondering how on earth I'm ever going to get Huxley over here and join that elusive "adulthood club" and do all those "adult things" I'm supposed to do, like start a family and whatnot, if I can't afford it.

More and more I feel left behind by the rest of society, and it's not easy to deal with.
pikestaff: (Rainbow Dash - Do Not Want)
I'm writing this all out here mostly as a way to try and sort my thoughts (and also beg for advice.)

Read more... )
pikestaff: (Default)
I went to PetSmart yesterday to pick up some guinea pig food and a couple of otos for my tank. As is usual when I go to a pet store these days, I felt a weird sense of dissonance about being a customer and not an employee. I worked with these animals as a job, 40 hours a week, for three years. I can tell you the eating, breeding, and behavioral habits of over one hundred species of fish; I can tell you what makes a syrian hamster tick as opposed to a dwarf hamster, or a Chinese dwarf hamster, or a Roborovski hamster; I can tell you where a conure's favorite place to be scratched is; I can tell you why beardies are picky eaters and when they'll stop being picky eaters and I can tell you what a greek tortoise's favorite color is. And I should be teaching people all of these things and be on that side of the fence! Not over here on the customer side.

So as usual, it weirded me out.

I thought about asking them if they were hiring but a.) I've asked them like two or three times before and they've always turned me down, and b.) that would only lengthen my commute, so it's really not a good idea.

Anyways yeah.

Sears is cutting my hours like mad so I am in dire need of a new job; too bad there's nothing out here. Hrmm...


Jun. 6th, 2011 04:44 pm
pikestaff: (River)
So apparently it's Bring Your Grumpy, Passive-Aggressive Customers to Work Day today?

Seriously. Like three of them, all in a row.

The last person was the worst; she was sitting there spouting off to a manager for like three minutes about how "Some people shouldn't [some normal thing I did that she apparently didn't like]." I was this close to dishing it right back out at her-- I genuinely try to be a friendly and helpful person when helping most customers, but I am not afraid to give particularly snarky customers a taste of their own medicine (I'm kind of surprised I've never been called out on it, actually)-- but this particular manager that she was whining to is super-bro-tier and I know she could see through the customer's thinly veiled BS and that she was on my side, so I let it slide.

Still, it really ground my gears. I even stayed way past my scheduled shift to help this lady out, and this is what I get? Good word.

Oh, and according to a different customer: if I don't know the answer to a question about some super obscure tool designed specifically for a super obscure part for a riding mower, it's obviously because I'm a girl and not because I'm, I dunno, simply inexperienced or something.

So yeah, that was my day today! I steamed pretty much all the way home. Feeling a little better now, but still. Yes I mad.

Now, I'm going to play SMAC and Skype with my boyfriend until I pass out!

Rant Time?

Apr. 17th, 2011 08:34 am
pikestaff: (Rainbow Dash - Not Impressed)
I'm feeling pretty claustrophobic and trapped lately. I really want to be back out on my own again-- setting my own schedule and making my own mistakes and not worrying about everyone else's problems on top of mine (because that's just how empathic I am. If you are in the same household as I am, I will worry incessantly about your problems. It was MUCH easier when it was just, well, me.)

I don't mean this in an angsty teenager sort of way... or maybe I do. I 'unno. I was joking the other day that my angsty teenager period of life seems to be showing up a decade and change late (I was too busy playing Zelda, Goldeneye 007 and Pokemon the first time around, apparently), so who knows!

But really I do love my family, it's just hard when you've been living with them on and off for the last 27 years. Ya know?

As I'm sure most of you know by now, this period of living with them was supposed to help me shore up money to move out again, but with the divorce and the moving and having to quit my stable job and everything that all sort of... crumbled down around me pretty quickly and now I feel very stuck. I don't want to be stuck anymore. Really, I need to start working on my books again, and also locate a job that's closer to home so I don't keep flinging money at the gas station every week. Easier said than done on both counts, though!

I think moving back to Montana is a pipe dream at this point unless I either stumble across a large cache of money or someone at least donates me a U-haul truck and gas money for it. So now I think the plan is to just get some sort of job here, make as much money as I can from that, and then GTFO this gorram island as quickly as possible. I don't care where I go-- somewhere where there's a better chance at a job. I'll probably inch closer to Seattle. Closer to the city = more jobs = more money!

And writing, writing, writing... Windshifter needs to be edited again. I know exactly what I need to do, I just need motivation to do it. I also need to pick up that kids' book I started writing around Christmas time and finish that because I think it has potential and would be easier to market to agents than anything else I've got so far.

Welp, sorry for the rant. Just had to get it all off of my chest. I'll be fine; don't worry about me too much~


Mar. 18th, 2011 11:51 am
pikestaff: (PikaRaichu)
I'm tired of my life sucking because I'm scared of everything. I mean, I can't stop being scared of everything, because that's just sort of how I am, but I've temporarily pushed it aside and put down an ultimatum before, and I want to do that again.

I'm giving work two, maybe three weeks to see if my hours improve. I don't need 30-35 hours a week like I was getting around and immediately after Christmas (though it would be nice), but I definitely need something closer to 25 as opposed to, I dunno, the 15 that I've been getting all month. The reason I'm giving work a couple of weeks is because anytime I've raised concerns about hours they pacify me by talking about how I'll get more hours in the spring when people come in for lawn mowers and tractors, so I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt for a moment.

But if my hours don't improve by then, I'm putting in my two weeks notice and going back to Montana ASAP. I've already talked to my dad about it. We're not sure if we can wrangle me getting all of my stuff back over there, so it may just end up being me, my computer, my pets and a suitcase full of clothes and books and video games in my car as I drive back. But as he was telling me, don't worry, we can arrange new furniture and everything upon my return.

If it comes to that, I'll call PetSmart as well before heading over and see if they can at least give me something part time (25-30ish hours a week) because frankly I could probably pull that off as it would mean I wouldn't have to dump $120+ a month into gas as I do now. I don't know if they'll have an open full time slot anymore, as they're pretty limited (I was one of the very few full-timers there), but they love me and I'm 99% sure they'd at least make room for me part-time.

I'll also be looking for other jobs, of course.

Anyways that's my plan. The reason I'm typing this all up and posting it in public is to give me more incentive to stick to it and not chicken out like I've done with so many other tough things in my life. Everyone's support and encouragement would be lovely and appreciated. :3
pikestaff: (Profferlink - Thinking)
Every day, e-publishing (through Amazon or what-have-you) is looking more and more appealing to me. There are a couple reasons for this.

One is money-- I'm not even gonna beat around the bush with that one. Work is cutting my hours more and more each week (21 hours? Really?) and being sick also struck a blow to my latest paycheck. Meanwhile I'm trying to keep up with my bills and help my family pay for Internet and the like. At this point, any extra cash infusion is welcome, even if it's just a couple hundred bucks (I'm not expecting any sort of overnight riches from an e-book, particularly from an untested author).

Another reason is (presumably) greater control of my intellectual property and what I do with it.

The biggest reason, though, is simply that the more time goes on, the more I think that we're standing on the cusp of a major change in the publishing world. I'm nearly convinced that e-books are about to catch on in a major way. Not that I think they're going to kill traditional books-- much like blogs didn't kill traditional news sites-- but owning my ebook reader has made me appreciate how genuinely convenient such a device is and I really think that this is the future; that this is going to catch on.

I'd be a big derpface not to catch the wave early, right?

My only fear is that I might be completely wrong and then I'll end up blowing everything. I'm such a wuss.
pikestaff: (River)
I called the DMV. "Oh yeah, we got a response from your lienholder a while ago. Didn't anybody call you?"


Things promptly went from bad to worse, though, because then I was informed that Montana is one of the few states that gives the title to you before you're done paying it off. Which means I have it somewhere. Which means it's probably in an unmarked box in a storage unit in Bozeman, Montana, 600 miles away.


I called my dad and he's going to attempt to look for it tonight but neither of us are holding our breath. So I'm going to go down to the DMV now and get temporary license plates, which grant me 60 days of immunity from cops while I attempt to get a duplicate title. Knowing Wells Fargo Dealer Services, this is going to be the biggest headache in the world.

(Also getting the temporary plates is scary because supposedly if I go past the 60 days and I still don't have the title, they take my car away. Awesome...)
pikestaff: (Kain is Scared)
Okay guys, here's the deal. The tabs on my license plates expired, well... the week I moved out of state.

Upon arriving here I promptly got a new Driver's License and then went to go get new License Plates. Well, slight problem. Because I'm still paying off my car I need to get the lienholder to fax the title to the DMV before they'll give me license plates.

After playing considerable amounts of phone tag I finally got an answer from both parties along the lines of: Lienholder: "Okay we'll set it up to be faxed" and DMV: "We'll call you when we get the fax."


I have called since then and both parties feign complete innocence. "Oh, we faxed it." "Oh, we never got the fax." Also, apparently the DMV has actually faxed them, asking for the fax, to no avail.

My problem is, now that I have a job that is millions of miles away, I'm spending a total of an hour and a half on the road each day WITH TWO MONTH OLD TAGS, and I'm stuck in this horrible state of limbo because I have a Washington Drivers' License and Montana plates. And I've heard that the cops here are brutal. They're not gonna care about my rigmarole with all of this, they're just gonna slap me with a fee that I can't pay.

Now it's possible that I'm over-reacting and that nobody is going to notice and/or care before I actually get the plates thing sorted out, but I hate this feeling hanging over my head that I'm playing Russian Roulette with the police twice a day. Regardless, I'm calling both the DMV and the car dealer again tomorrow morning, but I'm pessimistic on the outcome.
pikestaff: (Profferlink - Thinking)
I see connections between systems.

That probably doesn't make sense. Which is fine. Let's just say I seem to be living in a world where people make everything into a weird lifeboat situation and I just don't see things that way.

Sometimes I wonder if anyone else out there is like me.


Okay, so that was enigmatic, and I apologize. This post was going to be a lot longer but I wasn't satisfied so I cut most of it.

~*~*mysterious mysteries*~*~
pikestaff: (Devious Snaps)
Ah yes, it's that time again, when a geeky twentysomething's thoughts turn to going back to school...

...so yeah, no big secret that I want to go back to school. Preferably for something a wee bit more practical than "film", but which I am still interested in. My biggest fear is that whatever I pick is going to turn into the next "film", aka, something that I am obsessive over at the time but which kind of blows over two or three years later. And then I'm going to be stuck again.

As part of an effort to try to avoid this trap I've mostly been contemplating the two possibilities that seem to have held my interest the longest: computers, and chemistry. But I've had a few "Well you shouldn't major in that because... [insert reasons here]" responses from reasonable people on each one and that combined with my other fears has me waffling on them.

Anyways, everybody keeps telling me I'd be a good teacher so I'm keeping that open as a possibility too. First I was thinking science teacher, then the other day somebody told me I should be a history teacher* and I was all, "Hmm. I could see that."

Who knows though? I want to pick something and stick with it and love it, because I don't want to be that 30-year-old working in retail, but it's so hard when I want to do EVERYTHING. (Did I mention that I want to take flying lessons, also? That has been a lifelong dream of mine.)

Perhaps from now on when people ask what I want to do when I grow up, I'll tell them "Collect useless degrees." That sounds like a plan to me.


* What brought this on was my ability to determine what specific decade a certain 19th century fashion was from, which I completely blame on MONTHS OF NOVEL RESEARCH, by the way. *shifty eyes*
pikestaff: (Giddy Snaps)
I don't read very often.

There, I said it!

When I was a kid, things were different, of course. I was the world's biggest bookworm ever. I devoured books like candy. Like Skittles. I have memories of sitting on my bed with a pile of about ten books in front of me and going through and reading a chapter in one book and then moving on to the next and then to the next and on and on, all day.

But as time went on I was reading less and less and by the time I was in high school I was down to probably two or three books a year, max, and most of them were books I'd already read before. These days it's probably even less.

Since then, I have tried to make various valiant attempts to get back into reading, although usually these aren't very successful.

I'm not really sure why I stopped reading. "Busy" seems like a lame excuse since I'm really only working 36 hours a week. "Video games" aren't a good excuse, either, since I've always played those-- I've been gaming as long as I've been reading. The only thing I can think of is that I would rather spend time "creating" than "consuming", but I find that conclusion to be rather unsatisfactory, firstly because it sounds pretentious and secondly because it makes it sound like reading is a Bad Thing, which it's obviously not.

Regardless of the reason, I always feel kind of bad about not really being a Reader. Sometimes I try to pretend to be one, in order to keep up with all my super well-read Literary Peers, but who am I kidding? Books simply aren't as important to my life as they once were. Which makes me feel pretty terrible! =X

Anyways, as a sort of sideline to this, I really want one of those newfangled e-reader things. I think what would happen is that I would become positively enamored with said device (as I tend to get over small electronic/mechanical things that I find particularly clever), and then I would read A TON just as an excuse to use the thing. I dunno if I can justify $200 on one, though. Especially since I'm supposed to be using this time at my parents' to, you know, actually pay off all my bills.

Decisions, decisions...


Jul. 7th, 2010 09:37 pm
pikestaff: (Jedi Pooh)
I keep thinking I should update LJ but I'm not sure what to update it with.

Umm, I'm still waiting for my Neopets accounts to come back. I've sorta kinda switched to Teripets, which is a site I've played off and on since 2005. It's basically Neopets except run by individuals out-of-pocket rather than run by a big corporation. It has a fraction of the community and a fraction of the stuff to do, but the art is pretty and it has the basics that I'm looking for (customizable pet site that involves things like restocking/moneymaking) and I'm sure their customer service doesn't take weeks to get back to you =P

Actually, as far as Neopets is concerned, I'm 90% certain I'm never gonna see my Draik again, because in my well-meaning idea to send him over to a side, I inadvertently sent him to a side that had been cracked before, and Neopets gets harsher and harsher the more a certain account has been cracked. So while I think I'm on step 475 of 476 of getting my main account back, I'm still somewhere around step 1 or 2 on the side, and I think they're gonna keep ignoring me. GG, self!

/end Neopets rambles that nobody will care about or comprehend

Ummm my apartment gets inspected tomorrow. Most of my family is gonna head over in the morning with me and help me clean. Then I'll finally be done with the whole ordeal. Except for the unpacking bit...

BUT ON THE OTHER HAND: Toy Story 3 tomorrow! I love that I've grown up with this series. I was in sixth grade when I saw the first. <3
pikestaff: (Foxkeh)
Both Neopets accounts are now frozen. Sent in recovery forms for both. No idea if I'm getting both or either back.

Moooostly moved in to my new place. Wireless is sketchy but works. The ultimate test will be to see if WoW works (was far too tired to test last night, and maintenance today. Oh, also, my account expired. That might throw a wrench in the system also.)

I still have some crap to take care over over at the old apartment but I figure I can do that throughout the week, between work shifts.

My family is massively super into organic/all-natural/gluten-free/etc. foods so I have installed a mini-fridge in my room so I can continue eating like a pig, haha. *watches lifespan take a nose dive*

So, these? Yes. VERY YES. K is for Potassium. I laughed hard and I shall continue to do so.
pikestaff: (Pandaren)
Logged into Neopets this morning to do my dailies and found my account had been ransacked: 6 million Neopoints gone and my inbox full of mysterious neomails regarding doing business with someone else over a super rare item at 3 AM. Logged into a side account, which had a completely different password, and found a similar story: Neopoints gone and several mysterious neomails from "me" regarding buying various rare items.

Miraculously, though, all of my actual pets were untouched, including my Draik: the rarest and most expensive pet in the game.

I went on a password-changing spree and then whipped off a neomail to TNT (The Neopets Team) explaining the situation. It was at this point that I remembered that the last time something similar happened and I neomailed TNT, they froze my account. So in a rare moment of foresight I quickly transferred my Draik over to a side account. It turns out that this was quite prescient of me, because no more than five minutes later, my account was frozen. The good news is that this time the reason they give for freezing is "for my own protection" as opposed to last time's "because you broke the rules" so I'd like to think I have a good shot at getting it back, eventually.

So my Draik is safe. But most of my other pets are gone. And six million Neopoints-- a year of saving-- also gone.

Even if TNT gives me my account back, the NP are gone for good. People who are used to, say, Blizzard's typical way of customer service in this regard are usually shocked to find out that the Neopets equivalent is essentially "We'll give you your account back, but not any lost items/money, because it's your own damn fault." And to be fair, they're right-- my fault for not browsing with NoScript on my Firefox, which you basically have to do these days.

Makes me sick though. Ugh. I love this game but this keeps freaking happening. It also really disappoints me that the human race pulls off stunts like this. I mean, you'd think I'd be used to it by now, having worked in retail and seeing dozens of examples of theft every single day. But I guess I just had hope that the world was better than this.

At least my watch gets more and more accurate by the day. The one thing in my life that doesn't let me down.
pikestaff: (Jetfire/Skyfire)
* It appears that I will have to have wireless internet when I move. For the uninformed, wireless & Linux play together about as nicely as an Oscar fish and a feeder minnow. In my years of tinkering I only found one Linux distro that I could get working with my wireless card, and said distro is now outdated and no longer supported. I guess to be fair that was a few years ago, back before I moved and got cable, so hopefully things are better by now? I dunno, guess I will burn like ten different distro CDs before D-Day and hope for the best.

I really don't want to use Windows because that is how much of a Stubborn Freetard I am. So if I disappear from the internet for a while it is because I am not eating, drinking, or sleeping until I can get it working on Linux. Be forewarned. (I really wish I could get time off of work for said Impending Major Computer Project but I know I won't be able to.) (Also I keep alternating between being very excited and somewhat annoyed that said Impending Major Computer Project is now hanging over my head.)

* As much as I love being Crazy Fish Lady and knowing TONS about fishkeeping, it sort of feels like yet more useless knowledge that won't help me in a serious job-search, especially around here. You non-local LJ buds have to realize: I live in one of the least densely populated areas in the country. There isn't something like an aquarium around for hundreds of miles. Heck, we're the only pet store for hundreds of miles. Or however far away Helena is. Like... 80?

* Speaking of which, I love Bozeman, and I'd do anything to spend the rest of my life here, but good word that is sounding like less and less of a possibility as the days go on. Unless I pull off the writing thing. Which would be ironic because I never really wanted to be a "professional author" anyway (seriously, that's all just a side project. One that will drive me crazy if I don't finish it.)

* Best part about being a writer though: you can turn super cheesy emo things that you write into a part of your stories. And get away with it. *evil cackle*

* I have pet store related rants but those will probably go into a separate post because I don't want to crit your friends list with OMGSPAM.
pikestaff: (House O RLY)
Feeling massively restless lately and I'm not sure why. All I want to do when I come home from work is eat, check my websites/e-mail, and then go to bed. ...which I guess is the opposite of restless. Maybe I'm not actually restless. I dunno.

Lemme rephrase this: I feel like I need to do something but I'm not sure what. Most of my usual "things to do" have lost their appeal.

I want to wait to do any more polishing on my book until I get some more feedback. (Don't take that as me trying to rush you readers, by the way-- I also like to let it sit for a few weeks between draft versions anyway.)

Drawing... I don't even know, drawing was basically all I was doing a few months ago and these days I'm just not feeling it.

World of Warcraft can hold my attention for about 20 minutes and then I have to log out for the rest of the day. Alts of classes I had never played before was interesting for a couple of weeks but now even those have lost their luster. I guess three months of hiatus wasn't long enough. Maybe I'll hiatus again...

Packing I'm saving for my days off because the last thing I want to do when I get home from work is throw everything into boxes.

I feel like I want to start some sort of gigantic art project but I'd rather wait until after I've moved and everything.

I dunnooooo...

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