Hey:

Aug. 1st, 2021 04:04 pm
pikestaff: (Giddy Snaps)
This blog is no longer updated and exists solely as backup for my old Livejournal, which itself I stopped using many years ago. Everything has been privacy-locked except for a handful of posts about old writing projects, as those particular posts were always intended to be public.

I'm afraid I won't be linking to any of my current hangouts because I've had to deal with a weird stalker issue in the past and I want to play things safe. If for some reason you really want to know where to find me today, and we have mutual friends, one of them can probably tell you. Otherwise, I hope you have a lovely life. 💖
pikestaff: (Default)
(I sincerely doubt anyone reads this anymore, but that's fine, since most of my rambles are for my own benefit more than anything.)

I had a difficult time really getting myself into this last year's NaNoWriMo, "Cricket Song". And I always feel bad when I say that. See, I did like the characters. I did like the story. I did like the points that the story made, and its moral. I'm very proud of this little book (it really is little... a smidge over 50k, and it won't get much bigger.) Why, then, did I have such a hard time feeling it the way I did with Windshifter? Why do I have no motivation to re-read and edit it?



I don't know. Perhaps it's because none of the characters really "spoke" to me the way, say, Sparktender did last time. Or perhaps it's because the story's subject matter didn't feel as close to me as my last one did-- which is odd, seeing as "Cricket Song" is largely autobiographical, in a very allegorical sort of way. Or maybe I was just still in love with "Windshifter" from last year and making the switch over to a new story has been more difficult than I thought it would be.

Ultimately, I know that this is a story I can get excited about, because I remember when I was first really brainstorming the project last summer I got all excited about it. Boy, was I ever excited about it. That excitement sort of faded away for some reason that I don't understand, and never quite came back to 100% (it rose up to maybe 75% or so during NaNo itself). I'd love to get down to editing the story, though, which is why I'm searching for a way to get that excitement up to 100% again.

Here's to Alpha Reader feedback and hoping that I get some of that soon, and that that stokes the fire a bit.
pikestaff: (Default)
*rez's blog*

(spoilers abound, as usual...)



Sparktender is a character that I just got right.

He popped out of nowhere, really. The original character concept was much, much different than the complex and beguiling soul that made himself manifest in chapter two. I hate to use the "this character was writing himself" cliche, but he essentially was.

Now, I feel strongly that the best way to make a good compelling character is to be an actor and actually "get in character". Put on the mask and ask yourself what your motivation is. Get into your character's head.

For whatever reason, Sparktender's head happens to be really easy to get into. And putting on that mask is... quite an experience. Putting on the Sparktender mask floods my mind with feelings that I didn't even know my character had. He's such a caring, empathic, feeling guy and all this bad stuff happened, one right after the other, completely ruining his life. To make matters worse, he is convinced that a good portion of it was All His Fault. So he cuts himself off from the world and this guilt follows him around everywhere he goes, haunting his dreams and memories...

It's very tragic.

The tragedy of it all hits me when I "put on the Sparktender mask". It's sort of overwhelming. There's moments when I'm choked with emotion when writing his character. Choked with emotion when listening to songs that remind me of his character. I teared up more than once when writing his scenes. Because of all of that, he's sort of... "special" to me that way.

It sort of feels slightly narcissistic-- how attached I am to my own character. Is my character really that great, or is this all residual feelings from that whole AuthorCrush thing?

Regardless, the truth is that because I was able to invest myself so deeply in Sparktender, it shows rather obviously in writing. When I posted up my prologue on my LJ-- in which Sparktender was the main character-- I got comment after comment about how interesting of a character he was. I felt like a proud parent. It makes me really happy to see that other people like him. And I also believe that the reason he is so interesting is because I was able to really get inside his head, somehow.

The secret weapon now becomes: how do I do this with my other characters? They're harder to get into. More distant. They don't wear their hearts on their sleeves quite the same way Sparktender does. But get into them I must, somehow, because that's how the best stories are written.

...so, that was the most rambly thing I've ever written. Hmm.
pikestaff: (Default)
Wherein I talk about the evolution of the book and the 180 degree turn it took this last October.

Cut for rampant spoilers )
pikestaff: (Default)
Windshifter, the character, has been around in some incarnation or another for, well... half my life, now. He was invented not long after I invented Pikestaff, my longstanding "alter-ego", and his original purpose was to troll Redwall roleplaying message boards.

See, "Redwall" is a book series about anthropomorphic animals that live in a fantasyish sword & sorcery setting. I was a big fan at the time and various roleplaying boards set in their universe abounded in the late 90s, and naturally, I inhabited a few of them. Many of the members of these boards were "purists", in that they only accepted characters whose species were those that existed in the books. Mice, squirrels, hedgehogs, otters, hares, and a few others. If you tried to roleplay a chipmunk or raccoon, for example, they'd get all worked up over it because those animals did not exist in Redwall canon.

So I thought, wouldn't it be funny if I showed up as something outlandish and tried to roleplay as it? The most outlandish animal I could think of was a dragon, and thus Lyte Windshifter was born, named (the last name, anyway,) by one of my friends as we went Trick-or-treating on a crisp Halloween night.

I have zero recollection of how I introduced Windshifter onto the Redwall roleplaying boards or what sort of reaction he got, so it must not have been particularly important. I do remember that I promptly decided that I liked the character too much for him to simply be a throwaway trolling character, and I started to morph him into something different. Now I was 13/14 years old at the time, (so you really can't expect anything too exciting), and as such my first idea was to make him an absent-minded comedic character. The funniest juxtaposition I could think of was that he should be a psychologist with ADD. So that's what he became. I drew a lot of pictures of this anthropomorphic dragon kneeling on the floor, scribbling on a piece of paper with a look of glee on his face. That was Windshifter, in a nutshell. Brilliant but goofy.

He was also naked, Bugs Bunny style, except for a tie. (I guess the thought that he didn't actually possess fur and probably couldn't get away with being pantsless hadn't occurred to me yet.)




At some point around here I put him into this plotline that was developing in my head. The plotline and its evolution deserves its own post (and will get one, eventually), but in short, it went something like this: Windshifter is a klutz and a bit of an outcast who lives in a fictional world that is very equivalent to our modern one. As it turns out, though, he is a sort of "chosen one" (I'm super original, no?) and he winds up traveling across a cursed sea and winding up in a fantasy world filled with bizarre creatures that looked like rabbits or that had springs on the tops of their heads. It was at this point that the story turned into a cross between "Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court" and more traditional fantasy fare.

The story went through several (mostly small) evolutions between that point and, well, this last October, but that's all subject matter for another post.

Windshifter, himself, went from being a psychologist to being an office peon (because I decided there was no way his character could have ever graduated from med school) and then, in his final incarnation before being revamped, turned into a twenty-something college kid. The comic-relief aspect of his personality was toned down a bit with each redo in an attempt to make him a more sympathetic character, but he was always, at his core, a clumsy fellow with a woefully short attention span and shoes that were perpetually untied.



When I decided a few months ago that I was going to redo the book, I was faced with the decision of keeping that aspect of Windshifter's personality intact or scrapping it. I decided to mostly scrap it, but keep some of the awkwardness and baggage that came along with being a little "off-kilter".

And so it was that he was transformed into the main character of my recent novel.

As I was writing the book, I had this fear in the back of my head the whole time that his personality wasn't strong enough. That he was so much of an everyman that he lacked his own real individuality. This sort of confused me initially, since I've written "everyman" characters before that were rather strong, but Windshifter wasn't giving me quite the same vibes.

So here I am, writing "Who is Windshifter?" in an attempt to see if I can find that personality or if it's something I still need to work on.

Windshifter runs on a motor of profound curiosity. He must know how things work. He learned early on in his life that asking didn't get him very far, so instead he took things apart to answer this constant question. The big question nagging him, of course, is where did he come from? His watch is his only link to his past, and as such it's become a soul of sorts: if something ever happened to it, it might just break him.

He isn't entirely happy unless he's among clockwork or machinery of some kind. He feels a connection to it that he can't quite explain. Machines don't judge him, and if they act up, it's something he can fix. His approach is frequently intuitive: for example, he would tell you that a machine is "on its way out" or "dying" although it acts, looks and sounds perfectly fine to the layman, but then two days later it would fall apart... just as Windshifter had predicted it would.

Because of the close ties that he feels to technology and machines, he sees them as almost possessing a personhood of some sort, and to mistreat a machine would be near unthinkable. He's the type of guy who wouldn't push a car faster or harder than it would go. Others may view him as overly cautious, but to Windshifter he'd just be treating his "friends" well.

He embraces technology while viewing mass production of technology to be somewhat profane. In the book, he is horrified to find out that clocks are no longer being produced with artistry and one-on-one attention, but unthinkingly in an assembly line by people who don't really care. This, to him, would be akin to an art connoisseur discovering black and white photocopies of the Mona Lisa in a gallery, or perhaps something even more morally perverse.

As far as personality goes he is a friendly person overall, if rather shy... he doesn't start conversations with people he doesn't know, although he starts to come out of his shell a little throughout the course of the book. With those he does know well he is fairly laidback and easy-going. He has a tendency to hyperfocus on projects that he is working on and will block out most of the rest of the world when he is really concentrating on something. When he feels strongly about something, he isn't afraid to come out and say so, although his moral outbursts possibly surprise him more than anyone.

He is an optimistic soul overall who is troubled by violence but understands that it's probably necessary sometimes. If he could, he'd live in a world where information is free, curiosity reigns surpreme, and mankind, nature and his beautiful machines live in harmony with each other.
pikestaff: (Default)
Frankly it's rather difficult to quantify this one, I think. When I was younger I devoured books of all sorts, and all genres, and then as I grew older my reading time grew lesser and lesser to the point that when I first decided to revamp "Windshifter" this last October, I actually hadn't really read anything in a long time. Maybe this was actually a good thing, because it allowed me to mostly use my own style rather than emulate that of another author's as I tend to do... but I digress.

Cut for length )

I could go on and on and I'm sure I'm not scratching the surface of this, but it's bedtime now...

Music

Jan. 7th, 2010 07:27 pm
pikestaff: (Default)
My book has a "soundtrack" of sorts that goes along with it. Basically I compiled a bunch of music together and listened to it while writing. Some songs were just played for general ambiance but others had very specific characters or scenes associated with them.

I decided to share some of them here for posterity more than anything, (and for my own benefit). It's probably not really in any particular order, other than maybe roughly chronological.

WARNING: Possible spoilers.

Massive list crits you for... )

I may come back and edit this if I left some stuff out. Next time: literary/intertextual influences!
pikestaff: (Default)
Current Word Count: 60,300 words. (I don't really have a goal for this, I just think it'll be fun to track.)

***

Current Reviews From Other People: I've yet to get a good solid in-depth review from anyone else, which I should probably fix at some point.

My 12-year-old sister has read a "polished first-draft" manuscript in its entirely and though I haven't talked to her personally, I have been informed that the book inspired her to a.) make fan characters for the setting, and b.) play Final Fantasy games. The jury is out on whether that last point is good or not...

My 15-year-old sister, last I checked, is somewhere in the middle of said polished first-draft and "likes it".

My boyfriend and a fellow blogging friend are both somewhere in the middle of said polished first-draft and both have given me positive (albeit rather superficial) reviews thus far.

My two main worries at this point, regarding peer review, are that a.) all the feedback I've gotten thus far has not been very specific, and b.) people seem to be taking an inordinately long time to read it. Both of these combined are making me nervous about the possibility that it's really not that great of a book and people are simply giving me nice sympathy reviews.

...but I'm probably just being paranoid.

Hopefully.

***

Where I'm Feeling Stuck In the Editing Process:

* The characters get very nicely from plot point to plot point but I worry that they're getting there too nicely and thus the reader won't be able to form much of a relationship with said characters. So, I really feel like the story really needs to be expanded somehow, but I'm not sure how to go about it. It just really reads like an abridged version to me and I don't like it that way.

* There are a couple plot points/concepts/motifs that need to be better wrapped up.

* I have a few ideas for scenes that I think should go into the book but I have no idea where to put them.

* There are some scenes that really need to be redone that I'm having massive editor's block with.

***

The To-Do List:

For anyone who hasn't read the story yet (aka pretty much everyone) this won't make any sense. However, it's here for my benefit more than anyone's, so!

This is a list that I pulled together a week or two back when I was just finishing up my first quick edit. As you can see, I haven't gotten very far since then...

Cut for length )

When you're staring at a list that big, you can't help but feel a little overwhelmed.

Current Short-Term Goals:

Write an outline. Maybe the reason my book just feels "off" to me is because of the lack of an outline.

Fit various extra scenes into said outline.

And we'll go from there...
pikestaff: (Default)
I've been writing a novel since November 1, 2009. Yes, that is the day NaNoWriMo started. Yes, I finished NaNoWriMo. Since then, I went on to finish the novel itself and I'm currently languishing somewhere in Editor's Hell.

So.

This journal is going to exist from here-on-out (well, until I decide to change it again, anyway) as a documentation, workbook, and idea bank for myself to try to figure out how I'm going to go about this whole editing thing and fix some of the issues that I think my book has.

I'll be posting it online in blog-format as opposed to just in a text file or something partially because I like blog software and partially in case some people would like to add thoughts or are curious to read my own. (Hey, you never know!)

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